Through The Looking Glass
by DreamALittleBitBiggerDarling
Summary: When Revan is captured by the Republic after taking up the mantle of Dark Lord, Carth tries to bring her back to the Light Side while dealing with the aftermath of her choice. But is all as it truly appears?    *Updated*
1. Prologue

*Through the Looking Glass*

Summary: When Revan is captured by the Republic after taking up the mantle of Dark Lord, Carth tries to bring her back to the Light Side while dealing with the aftermath of her choice. But is all as it truly appears?

Rating: M, for themes, language and some descriptions (just to be safe)

Criticism is appreciated, welcome, rejoiced, etc.

* * *

><p>Prologue<p>

The sun was high in the sky shining down on the beaches of the Unknown World. Revan ran quickly along the rocky paths followed by her new apprentice Bastila. She had to get to the Hawk to stop Malak before it was too late.

"Master, I don't see why we didn't just kill them. It isn't as if they're useful to us and they'll add to the number of people who will oppose-." Revan stopped running to cut off Bastila with a cold, hard glare, knowing who she was talking about.

"If I want your opinion I will ask for it. Fighting them would have caused us to waste time that we need to defeat Malak." She raised her hand up to hold Bastila by the throat. "Question my judgement again and you will never question anyone again!" Revan threw her to the side and continued to run towards her ship. Bastila picked herself up quickly and ran after her, making a mental note to keep her thoughts to herself until Malak had been defeated.

Around the next curve the Ebon Hawk came into view, along with the rest of her crew. Revan paused to watch them. Carth was pacing back and forth in front of the loading ramp, Mission was laughing with Zaalbar and HK and Canderous were trading war stories. The sight of them together pulled at something inside of her. Bastila caught up with her and waited while she stood there watching them.

"Master?" Bastila asked, unsure of what was happening. Revan shook her head, knocked out of her thoughts. She turned and nodded to Bastila, then continued to run down to the Hawk.

"Schuyler, you're back! We were all worried about you, when Jolee and Juhani said they had to go…Wait, where's Jolee and Juhani?" Carth asked Revan, standing directly in front of her.

"They are gone Carth. They turned against us." Bastila turned and looked at Carth intently.

"What? No they can't be…they…wait, Revan what's wrong with you? Your eyes…." He stared at her face, her eyes dark and hard, completely opposite of how they normally were.

"I've turned to the Dark Side, Carth. "

"No, you can't have! No, no…this isn't true…You can't have. I won't let you…"

"Awww. Master I do believe he's in love with you." Bastila cut through their conversation, her comment laced with sarcasm. Revan ignored her and continued to talk with Carth.

"I have Carth. There's nothing you can do to change me back. Or anyone else. Either side with me or get out of my way. I am the true Lord of the Sith."

"NO! This isn't you! We can fight this, I'll help you fight this, but it isn't you!" Carth held her face in his hands, trying to get through to her.

"He's right Sky! It isn't you, you can't be Darth Revan." Mission's voice was thick, as she tried to hold back tears. "You're not her anymore, you said so yourself." Revan stepped back, removing Carth's hands from her face.

"If you aren't with me, you're against me." Bastila's face lit up in a dark smile upon hearing Revan's comment, as she ignited her lightsaber. Finally Revan was acting as a true Sith Lord. Finally blood would be spilled.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter One

As Carth walked around the hallway, he realized how much it reminded him of their stay on the Leviathan. Although there were bright lights running the entire length of the prisoner's hallway, the cold, dark metallic colour of the walls still made things look miserable.

_It's cool. She'll be freezing._ He thought to himself as continued to walk down the hallway. He remembered her continuously stealing his jacket while searching for the Star Maps. She was always cool, only comfortable in the heat. Tatooine had been like heaven for her as the heat sinked into her limbs. Her thought about the night they spent in the sand near the Krayt Dragon's cave:

_Their original plan had been to set up camp at the back of the cave while Bastila looked over her father's holocron and Schuyler studied the Star Map, but Canderous and Bastila had spent so much time bickering, they decided to move to the mouth of the cave. _

_Bastila had put up a fight saying that it was unwise to be apart, but Schuyler had shut her up with a smirk and a comment. "With the way you and Canderous were fighting so much, I thought it was your way of letting Carth and I know you wanted some 'alone time'," She told her, using air quotes. Bastila's face scrunched up, turning a dark shade of red, then purple and Schuyler dragged Carth away, trying to stifle her laughter. _

_They had spent the night lying on a blanket in the sand, making love several times. Her long limbs had wrapped around him as she whispered in his ear, telling him that she loved him, that there was no one else for her. He had responded in turn, telling her that he would never love anyone but her. _

Carth stopped in front of the door to the prison room, trying to shove the tears down as he replayed that night in his head. He hadn't lied that night; there would never be anyone but her. He nodded to the guard next to the door and they swiped their identification cards together to open it. Maximum security, the very best that the Republic had.

He walked into the room, shutting the door from the inside. By now he knew the layout of the room like the back of his hand. Although it was a Maximum Security Cell, it was her own strong will that made her stay there. The Jedi Council had given her two options: Go back to the council to be retrained in the Jedi ways, or be put on trial for her crimes. She had refused to pick one and they hadn't pushed her. Yet. So she was confined to the cell until she made a choice.

He turned around to look around the room, but nothing had been changed. He expected that. The bed was made, but it hadn't been slept in since last Thursday. She slept on the couch every day of the week

except Thursday. The guards that brought her food in had no idea why, but he knew; He was the reason for it. He was the reason that once a week she slept well.

His eyes trailed over her body, laid out along the couch. Her long, dark, curly hair framed her face. Her long legs were draped over the arm of the couch. Her simple peasant's dress fit snugly, showing off her curves. It was short sleeved, showing off her arms, and stopped above the middle of her thigh. She was beautiful; it almost pained him to look at her.

Her eyes were closed, a small smile coming onto her face as he walked closer to her.

"Carth." She opened her eyes slowly to see his warm, chocolate brown eyes looking into hers. A sad smile broke over his face.

"Hello beautiful." She set up swiftly, moving herself to clear a place for him on the couch. He sat down next to her and she brushed the stray pieces of hair from in front of his eyes.

"You look tired." Her fingers moved to stroke his cheek, feeling the stubble underneath her fingers. He sighed and covered her hand with his. This was what kept him alive every week: the feeling of her touching him, of being close to him. It was these moments that made him know that Schuyler was still in there; that Revan hadn't completely taken over yet. He pulled her into his lap resting his lips on the top of her head.

"It's been a rough week. Two of the Sith interdictor ships cornered a few of the small ships that were sent on…." He closed his mouth, knowing that he shouldn't be talking about this with her.

"Scouting missions? Did my men demolish them?" She pushed back from him to look into his eyes, a dark look in her eyes. He knew that he needed to divert the subject away before Revan completely came forward.

"When's the last time you've eaten? You feel lighter each time I hold you." He kissed the top of her head again. She chuckled darkly.

"I'm still strong enough to lead the Sith….and wipe out anyone who gets in my way." Her voice dropped, growing deeper.

"I brought something else for you to wear; the guards were instructed to escort you to the refresher for a shower, whenever you wanted it."

"What's wrong Carth? Not in the mood to talk about my true destiny? About what I should truly be

doing?" She stood up swiftly standing over him.

"Don't do this Gorgeous. This isn't you! It's not who you really are! Fight this, don't let it take you over!"

He stood up and looked at her, hoping that he would get through to her.

"Yes, of course, how dare I take up my true mantle. How dare I discuss it in front of Admiral Onasi. All he wants from me is a little action once a week. That's his true reason for being here. Because when Admiral Onasi wants something, he gets what he wants." Carth shook his head, pained that she would even think that.

"No, that is **not **while I'm here. I love you! I love you more than anything, I-"Revan snorted.

"You love the sex you get once a week. I'm just your little concubine, aren't I?" Her eyes grew darker and her voice got heavier. He shook his head again.

"NO! That is not what this is! I love you! Stop thinking like that, I told you that there wasn't anyone else for me, and I meant it!"

"Then get me out." Her voice was steady and deep as she looked into his eyes.

"I can't." He barely choked out, even though every fibre of his being wanted him to, wanted him to take her away with him and live life like they should be.

"Then there is nothing else to say." She turned away and walked to the other side of the room, away from him.

"No, don't do this Beautiful. Please…please look at me." He grabbed her hand from behind to turn her around. She turned slowly, looking at him, reaching up to touch his face again.

"You can't stay away from me can you?" He noticed her face almost looked sad. He grabbed her other hand with his and brought it to his lips. Her eyes grew lighter and the dark look that was on her face earlier was leaving quickly.

"No." His one word answer was all she needed to hear. She stood on her toes brushing her lips against his as she wrapped her arms around his neck, twisting his hair in her hands. He was seized by the feel of her against him and brought his lips to hers. She deepened the kiss, tightening her embrace around him. He picked her up in his arms and brought her to the bed. They made love three times that night before she fell into a deep sleep. He checked his watch and realized that he had to be back in his office in thirty minutes. It took thirty minutes to get out of the prisoner's corridor. He would be late, but he didn't care.

He got dressed quickly, glancing at her to make sure he didn't wake her. She shivered slightly and he pulled the blanket up more to cover her.

As an afterthought he left his jacket to keep her warm. He knocked on the door twice to let the guard know to let him out after turning the lights out. The door opened and Carth slipped out swiftly. They both swiped their cards again to lock it. Carth nodded at the guards and walked down the hall.

He made it to his office an hour and a half later, telling his secretary to hold all calls and visitors. He locked the door, and turned around, sinking against the door. When he reached the floor, he teared up quietly for the woman who held his heart. As the tears started to continuously poor down his face, outside in the dark Coruscant night, rain poured down heavily.

Somewhere in a prison cell far away from his office, he left more than he knew, behind with her.


	3. Chapter 2

Author's Note: So, since I didn't have any "You suck, stop writing, this story sucks too," on my comments, I figured that either you guys were too lazy to put a comment, or it didn't actually suck. However due to the comments of Taeniaea (Thank You!)and the fact someone added me to their Story Alert list, it made me decide to post another chapter. If you decide to finish out chapter three, please tell me what you think. Reviews are what makes my day, and helps me be a better writer :D

* * *

><p>Chapter Two<p>

_***Three Months Ago***_

Jolee Bindo walked out of the Jedi Council chamber towards the elevator, a grim look on his face. His meeting with the Council hadn't gone at all how he expected; he walked in, determined to get them to release Revan, at the very least on house arrest, and walked out not only with his request denied, but a promotion to Master. His head replayed their conversation about Revan, analyzing everything in hope that he would figure out something about where they were keeping her. Wrapped up in his own thoughts, he almost missed the man who had been waiting on him.

"Jolee! What did they say? Is she getting out? Where is she? Can we see her now? Where are they keeping her? You weren't in there for long, they must have agreed with what you said." Carth trailed off as Jolee shook his head.

"Calm down, sonny. We didn't get what we wanted. They denied any access to her and told me that her incarceration was her own choosing. Oh, and they promoted me to the rank of Master. Heh. As if that's what they needed right now. 'Oh, we won't allow you to see her, but here, have the title of Master.' Idiotic old fools…they wouldn't realize a bad thing if it came up to them making the same noises as an Uller in mating season." He crossed his arms trying to picture an Uller calling out during a council session. Carth sank down on the bench he had been standing in front of and put his head in his hands.

"I don't understand, Jolee. This…this isn't Schuyler. The woman I…The woman I fell in love with on the Hawk would never choose to go against the Republic, let alone choose to be locked up in a cell. It's not…We should've….,"he clenched his fists growing frustrated at the lack of words that he wanted to say. He was full of emotions: happy that she was alive, saddened that she was locked in a cell, angry at the council and the Republic for treating her like some kind of pawn. But with all that emotion, he couldn't figure out how to get it all into words no matter how hard he tried.

Jolee saw the pain on his face and sat down next to him sighing. He knew exactly how Carth was feeling; it was the same feelings he had when his own wife, Nayama, had turned to the Dark Side.

"I don't know what to tell you. Should we have seen it? Were there signs? Of course there were, even before she found out. You and Mission both told me about how she almost lost it with those Czerka workers who had killed that wookiee on Kashyyyk. And what about Tatooine? When Xor offered to buy Juhani from her? And she held him up by the throat against the ship and threatened to behead or castrate him? Canderous pulled her off, sure. But he told me later on that it wasn't easy, and that's saying something coming from a Mandalorian. She was always at risk for falling. It was just a matter of when would enough be enough."

"But when was that? When did she finally say that fighting for us wasn't important? That with the Sith was where she truly needed to be?" He looked up directly at Jolee, hoping that he had an answer.

Jolee shook his head again. "I think the only one who can answer that is Schuyler."

_***Now***_

Carth woke up suddenly in a panic, horrified his dream had become real. He looked next to him and realized that he was in his own bed, in his own apartment. Not in the holding cell with Schuyler's dead body in his arms, covering him in blood as his dream had been. He closed his eyes trying to calm himself down, but all it did was bring back his dream. Her dark brown hair matted with blood, pale skin painted with dark red streaks all over her, her green eyes glassy, staring into his….

"NO!" He jerked his eyes opened and swore, "Son of a-," he raked his hand through his hair. "Sithspit." He picked up his watch on the bedside table and put it on, glancing at the time and groaning. He had only been asleep for two hours, and he knew after a dream like that, he wasn't going to get back to sleep. He got up and threw a shirt on, walking out to the balcony. The cool Coruscant night air was a relief from the stuffy feeling of his bedroom. He glanced up at the stars and closed his eyes again trying to forget the image imprinted in his mind. He hadn't closed them for more than a minute when the dream came back, but this time it was different. She was still in his arms and looked exactly the same, but this time she talked to him.

"It's all your fault. I loved you and you gave me nothing in return." Dream Schuyler said, spitting out the last part, her eyes growing dark as Revan began taking over.

"No! No, I loved you Schuyler. I love you now! I'll give you anything in the world, just tell-" she cut him off.

"Then get me out." Her voice was deeper than usual, her eyes as black as the night sky as she said every word angrily and slowly. Carth shook his head slowly, pleading with her to understand.

"I…I can't."

"Then you never did love me." Out of the corner of his eye he saw what was going to happen but didn't have time to stop it. Within one quick smooth motion she pulled out her lightsaber and ignited it, stabbing herself in the stomach, ending her life. Carth yelled for her to stop, but it had no effect. He slowly removed the saber and turned it off before throwing it across the room. More blood poured out of her and he held her close to him, her last words repeating over and over in his head.

"_Then you never did love me…You never did love me….You never loved me…" _Carth's eyes snapped open and he could feel the tears pouring down his face. This wasn't how things were supposed to have gone. She was supposed to defeat Malak and come back to him. They were supposed to get married and start a family together, even if it meant she would be leaving the Order. He walked back inside quickly straight to the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of Alderaanian firewhiskey. Eight shots later and he was buzzed with thoughts of no one but her. He threw on a pair of pants over his boxers, and began looking for his jacket when he realized he had left it with her the last time he saw her, only three days ago. He paused, thinking about the fact that he had never come more than once a week to see her before. If someone figured out what was going on….He quickly exited into the hallway and locked the door to his apartment before briskly walking to the elevator. The quicker he got there, the quicker he could see her, consequences be damned. He was insane, being in love with a Sith Lord, but he didn't care. She meant the world to him.

He made it down there faster than he ever had before. If the guards thought it was odd that the normally formal Admiral came down again within just a few days, with a wrinkled t-shirt and pair of cargo pants, they didn't say anything. One of the guards got up to swipe his card with Carth's, saluting him before he went in. He saluted him back, then shut and locked the door behind him. He walked in and saw her curled up on the couch in his jacket, asleep. A tray of uneaten food lay cold on the table in front of it, and a few feet behind the couch, the bed was made up impeccably. He went over and grabbed a blanket from the bed before picking her up in his arms and laying down with her on the couch. He covered her with the blanket and wrapped his arms tightly around her. She buried half of her face in the crook of his neck, her hot breath on his skin. He kissed the top of her head, his hands roaming over her back. One hand stretched down to play with the bottom of her night gown. He slowly pushed it up and realized that that was all that was on her besides his jacket. He swore as all of the blood rushed downward towards his crotch.

She began to wake up when she heard his voice, pushing on his chest as she arched her back, stretching slowly. She kept her eyes closed for a minute until she realized that she wasn't on top of the couch anymore. She slowly opened her eyes and looked down at him.

"Carth." She looked straight at him, locking her eyes to his, no emotion on her face. He would have given anything to be able to hear what she was thinking. He ran his hands up her back and smiled.

"Hey, Beautiful." He slowly pushed her head towards his and kissed her. She laid back down on top of him and wrapped her arms around his neck. His mouth was warm and she could taste a hint of alcohol on his tongue. She moved her lips down to his jaw and traced it with her lips.

"You're drunk." She whispered in his ear, moving her hands underneath his shirt. He closed his eyes, feeling her cold hands caress his chest.

"No I'm not. I'm just….happy." He heard her chuckle.

"About?"

"You. You're alive…Not where I wish we were, but…." She moved herself so that she was looking at him. He mentally kicked himself for saying anything.

"Right. You'd rather have me on some little farm somewhere taking care of the children while you run off fighting the Sith." She pursed her lips. Carth was quiet as he attempted to figure out something to say that wouldn't upset her.

"What? Nothing to say now?" She got off the couch and stood over him, her arms crossed and her eyes narrowed. He sighed and sat up, running his hand through his hair.

"Beautiful, I'd be lying if I said that it isn't appealing. Hell, at this point I'd take having everything back how it should be, with us trying to sneak off and see each other. But this….this isn't what I thought of when I told you that I wanted a future with you." He looked up at her and saw that she smiled softly and sat next to him, brushing away those difficult strands of his hair.

"We could still have that. We could have a family, and be together." She brushed her lips on his and whispered softly. "All you need to do is get me out of here."

"I…I can't." She stood back up quickly, and Carth realized she was furious. "Beautiful, I want-"

"You want what? Sex? Because it seems to me that's all I'm here for. Is that why no one's made a decision yet, because you need me? Get out. Now!" She yelled at him, pointing to the door. "I don't want to see you again unless you've decided to let me leave you stupid _hu'tuun. _OUT!" She mustered up what little of the Force she could and pushed him towards the door. He unlocked the door and turned around one more time to see her.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, but he knew it wouldn't make a difference. He slipped through the door and went back to his apartment, not knowing whether or not he should come back.

* * *

><p>Now that you're finished, do us both a favor and hit that little button down there and review :D Please?<p> 


	4. Chapter 3

After a long hiatus, I'm back! So, for any of you that actually liked the story, and wanted to see more, here it is (: I'm aiming for a new chapter a day, so we'll try that. Please read and review, you'll make my day. (:

* * *

><p>"Ugh…" Schuyler leaned over and emptied last night's dinner into the toilet, glad she had skipped breakfast when she started feeling bad. Although the food was somewhat fresh, the gunk from the synthesizer would have tasted better to her. At least she knew where that food came from. She finished washing up and knocked on the door, signaling to the officers outside that she was done. The door opened and three Republic officers were outside waiting on her. Holding out her wrists, the officer in front of her slipped the stun cuffs back on her wrists and gave her a small smile. She pursed her lips and he moved out of her way, as she walked back to her quarters down the hall. The doors opened to a familiar face.<p>

"Get out. Now," she snarled, turning to the officers to unlock her cuffs.

"Now that's a great way to welcome an old friend. Solitary looks good on you." Jolee Bindo chuckled and sat down in an armchair across from the couch. She gritted her teeth and turned around, hearing the swooshing of the door closing behind her. She walked over to the couch and flopped down on it, closing her eyes and deciding to ignore him, hoping that he'd go away.

"I like this colour. What do they call it? Imprisonment gray? It certainly goes well with your steely persona and dark aura." He sighed when she wouldn't respond and started tapping his fingers. _Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap…_

"For the love of the gods, would you stop?!" Schuyler set up angrily, throwing the pillow from the couch at Jolee's head. He chuckled and waved his fingers, stopping it in midair.

"I can keep this up all day, girly. You want to get rid of me? Start talking. It wouldn't kill you to have a conversation with someone," he looked around the room and saw Carth's jacket haphazardly thrown in a corner of the room. "Especially, since you haven't talked to Carth in what? A month? Month and a half? It's been a while since I've seen that on him." He nodded towards the jacket, and she looked back. Her look became harder as she saw what he was talking about.

"You can take the damn jacket. Burn it, cut it up, do whatever the hell you want to with it. I don't give a damn."

"Really? So if I were to give it back to him, you wouldn't care?"

"Not in the slightest." The silence was deafening as neither one talked.

"Have you decided what you're going to do?" Jolee decided to break the silence, getting to the real reason why he had come.

"About what? Whether I'm going to go to trial so they can decide to execute me before I even get there or be retrained to be a mindless puppet of the Jedi Order? I'm comfortable enough right here."

"If you don't choose soon, they're going to make a choice for you." Jolee's voice was low, almost as if he was afraid that it was going to happen.

"Well maybe they can just wipe my memory and make me back into who I was before I found out." She replied angrily. Jolee opened his mouth as if to say something, and then shut it quickly. Schuyler knew what that meant; he had done it several times before. She rose up off of the couch quickly, balling her hands into fists.

"They actually considered it?!" She practically screamed. "After the absolute shit they put me through, they thought about going back and doing it again? I can't believe them! The hypocritical old fools! '_We are Jedi, we don't believe in hurting anyone,'" _she said in a mocking voice. "No! Of course not! Not unless it does something to further their own agendas!" She picked up the lamp on the table next to her and threw it across the room, her eyes darkening. Jolee stood up, his hands out in front of him.

"It was talked about, but I, along with several other members vehemently decided against it. We knew it was wrong the first time, and we knew that if we decided to do it again, the consequences could be more severe."

"More severe?," she chuckled darkly. "I should have gutted all of you like the pigs that you are when I had the chance." She started walking towards him.

"Schuyler…Schuyler, I told you, it wasn't me. I voted against it. I've been trying to get you out ever since you've been in. Schuyler, listen to me!" He barked out. He grabbed her shoulders and looked directly into her eyes, softening his voice. "Lassie, this isn't you. This dark person who is angry all the time, isn't you. All of us are worried about you. Ever since Carth-" Schuyler wrenched out of his grip.

"Carth doesn't give a damn about me and he never will! Get out. Get out!"

"Schuyler-" Jolee tried to grab her shoulders again, but she pulled her right arm back and punched him in the jaw.

"Get away from me and don't come back!" He rubbed his jaw and walked to the door, knocking to signal to the officer that he was ready to leave. The door opened and the officer nodded at the Jedi. He turned back one more time.

"He loves you. I know what you think, but it's wrong. We all do. Nayama and I never had any children, but you were the only person who I would have considered to be like a daughter. We just want what's best for you." He turned back to the door and walked out. The door closed behind him and Schuyler curled up on the couch. She felt the moisture on her cheeks before she realized that it was coming.

* * *

><p>Carth Onasi was in pain. It was obvious from the dark circles under his eyes that showed his lack of sleep to the hunch in his shoulders. Jolee noticed it right off when he walked in to see him.<p>

"Hey Admiral, shouldn't you be leading a fleet right now?" He plopped himself down in one of the padded chairs across from the desk that Carth was sitting behind, a stack of papers in front of him. He looked up wearily at the Jedi.

"Jolee. I'd tell you to take a seat, but it looks as if you already have."

"I'm old. I can't wait for you young people to give me a seat. I should be the one telling you when to take a seat," he chuckled. The left side of Carth's mouth halfway twitched in what Jolee could only assume was his try at a smile. He looked back down at his paperwork, signing the bottom and pulling a new stack in front of him.

"I saw her." Carth looked up hopefully, and then looked back down. He opened and closed his mouth several times trying to figure out what to ask. Jolee watched and waited, knowing how hard this whole thing had to be for him. "She's alright. A little more temperamental than the last time I saw her, but alright." Carth nodded his head.

"Has she come to a decision yet?" He asked quietly, still looking at the paperwork in front of him. Jolee sighed and shook his head.

"No, not yet. I told her that if she didn't someone would for her. The Council tried to get some of us to think about wiping her mind again." Carth looked up sharply at him, his eyes angry. "I did say tried didn't I? It didn't pass. Although there were several of us who thought it wouldn't be a bad idea, even more knew it would be a bad idea." He nodded his head again.

"She's not going to decide is she?"

"No, I don't think so. The way she sees it, either she'll be sentenced to a death sentence when she goes to trial, or she'll be brainwashed by the Council to do their bidding. She doesn't want either one."

"Can't exactly blame her, can you?" Carth said quietly. Jolee was silent. "I should've stopped all of this. I saw her slipping and I didn't do anything. I sat there and kept hoping that things would get better. Damn it! Why didn't I do anything?"

"Sonny, you can sit here and play the blame game with yourself all night, but it won't change the facts. Fact is, she chose everything that's led her here. The only thing you could've done was to be there for her and support her, and that's what you did. You can't-"

"Bantha shit!" I could've done something. She went out and she…she…" He put his head in her head and closed his eyes. "She spared all of us. Why? A Sith Lord wouldn't do that. Why would she do everything she did? That's not her. That's not Sky."

Jolee shook his head, knowing that if he told Carth what he had discovered while with her, his world would be turned upside down. But it did involve him. If he sent him down there to talk to her himself…He had a sneaking suspicion that she didn't know either. But it wasn't his place. Was it? He hadn't told everyone that he knew that she was Revan in the beginning…not that it would have helped anything. Would it have made a difference though?

"Jolee? You still with me?" He shook his head. He'd wait to tell until later; It wasn't his place to say anything yet.

"Sorry sonny. Just thinking. I don't know why she did everything, but if there's one thing Revan was known for during her time way back when, it was her skills as a master tactician."

"You think she organized all of this?"

"I do. And I think that she had this planned long before we got to the Rakatan planet."

* * *

><p>Now, I love reviews, so do us both a favor and please leave me one (:<p> 


	5. Chapter 4

So, since I haven't gotten any bad reviews yet, (or good either), I figured I'd go ahead and post another chapter (: I jumped around a good bit, but I had major issues trying to get it all down the way I wanted it to go.

If you like it, please post a review, it really does make my day! Thanks to those of you who are keeping up with it!

* * *

><p>"For the love of the force, would it kill you people to get me a bloody doctor?" Schuyler asked as she was walked back to her room. She'd been throwing up every day for the last couple of months, barely able to keep anything down.<p>

"And while you're at it, tell your **** chefs to keep their **** out of my food. I feel like **** enough, I don't need them poisoning my food, thank you very much." The officers didn't reply as they opened the door and slid off her cuffs. "Thanks for getting things done. The Republic's finest you are," she said sarcastically, before they shut the door on her face and returned back to their post. "Mindless idiots."

She looked around the room, and groaned. The steel walls seemed to swallow her up more and more every day, making her feel suffocated and small. She felt as if she was wasting away in the small room. She never had any visitors, not that she expected any to come. She wouldn't have minded if some of the crew had come at least once…she knew she could've persuaded Canderous to come bust her out. Zaalbar would have done it; he owed her a life debt. Mission probably could have too, if she had asked. She knew Juhani and Jolee wouldn't have. And the Order was probably guilt tripping and brain washing Bastila. Carth…she shook her head. She didn't need to be thinking of Carth. He meant nothing to her, just as she meant nothing to him, regardless of what he told everyone.

Walking over to the edge of the bed, she set down, careful not to spill the tray of food that had been placed there. People had come in to take things out of the room after she threw the lamp at Jolee a month ago. They said something about her being a "hazard" and then quickly left. She was now left with only the bed, the couch and the chair. The side tables, the lamps and even the pillows off of the couch had all been confiscated. There was more room, and yet it felt smaller. She felt smaller. She needed an escape…a way to get out. She glanced over at the knife on the lunch tray next to her. _Do it…_she heard a voice inside of her whisper. The same voice she had heard on the Unknown World after getting into the temple.

_It would be over before you'd know it…you could get away from all of this… _She shook her head. "No," she said out loud, reassuring herself that she wasn't saying it to herself. _Oh come on…a quick little cut across your wrist and you'd be done. You know you want to get out…think of this as an escape route, given to you by the Republic themselves…_

"No!"She jumped off the bed and stepped away from the plate. "No, it's not worth it…it's…it's not worth it…" Saying the last part quieter, she contemplated. Was it worth it? It's not as if she had anyone to care about her…they didn't care at all. She was all alone. She walked back over to the tray and picked up the knife. The short wooden handle fit easily in her palm as she pressed the blade against her wrist. She saw a small trickle of blood, and pressed harder. The trickle began running faster out of her vein, the smell finally bringing her to her senses. She threw the knife into the opposite wall next to the door.

"NO!" It lodged itself into the wall with a loud _THUD_, the wooden handle all that was sticking out. Her wrist was bleeding steadily, and she knew if she didn't stop it, it would only get worse. She took the napkin from the tray and wrapped it around her wrist, applying pressure while kicking the door to get the attention of the officers outside. The door opened to a young man from the next post. Schuyler held up her wrist.

"I need a doctor now, unless you want to let me bleed out here in front of you." He nodded and called to the other officers.

"The prisoner needs to get to the med bay. Now!" The first one tried to slip the stun cuffs on her, but realised it was a futile with the napkin around her wrist. Schuyler rolled her eyes.

"I'll be a big girl," she said condescendingly. "Now get me there before I die on you." He nodded and they quickly moved their way up the corridors.

* * *

><p>"She did what?!" Carth yelled loudly, making the Lieutenant in front of him wince hard.<p>

"She tried to cut her wrists. Or at least that's what I was told; she told Doc that it was an accident." He winced, preparing to be yelled at again. Carth sank down into his chair, running his hand over his face while sighing.

"Is she okay?" The Lieutenant nodded quickly.

"Yes, sir. She's fine. The doctor said that if she hadn't put pressure on it immediately afterwards, it would've been worse. It was deep, but not gravely so." Carth nodded his head and looked up, waving him off.

"You're dismissed, Lieutenant."

"Thank you, sir." He exited quickly, probably going off to tell everyone that he had seen the normally calm Admiral blow his top. He turned his seat around to look at the city behind him. Couruscant wasn't exactly on his list of places to be stationed at, but after Dodonna had been promoted to Fleet Admiral she'd asked him to come with her to Coruscant. She said she needed someone she could trust next to her side. He'd agreed after learning that Schuyler was going to be held there. There was a sneaking suspicion in the back of his mind that she knew that there had been something between them, and knew that he'd want to be with her. Dodonna might have acted like she didn't know everything, but she had known Carth for too long not to notice the way he acted when he talked about her.

The sun was just starting to set, bathing the concrete and steel buildings behind him in an orange and pink tinted light. He sat there for a while watching it go under, turning the sky dark. When he'd turned back around to his desk, he realised that he had been sitting there for the better part of two hours. He cleaned up his desk area, and headed out the door, saying good night to his secretary and headed back to his apartment.

When he dreamed that night, he dreamed of her. He dreamed of her laying next to him in bed, his arms wrapped around her, holding her close. When he woke up, he realised that he was crying. It wasn't like that, and it wouldn't be if he couldn't get through to her.

* * *

><p>"Doctor, perhaps you would like to come take a look at this." The med droid said to the doctor in the room. Schuyler guessed he was around Carth's age, with a clean, shaven face and blonde hair.<p>

"What's wrong, doc? My blood tainted or something?" She asked him. He turned to look at her, lifting one eyebrow. She smiled sweetly back at him. Turning to look at the tablet that the droid handed him, his expression dropped into one of surprise.

"Have you double checked the results?" He murmured to the droid.

"They are correct." Schuyler began to worry.

"Doc, what's wrong? What results need to be double checked?"

"It seems…it seems…" He looked back at the tablet.

"Seems what, doc?" She stood up and took a step towards him. "Doc?"

"Miss…Schuyler. It seems that you're pregnant." She exhaled sharply.

"No. Check it again. Check it again!"

"We have. You're pregnant." She sank down to the table. "I hate to ask this, but…do you know who the father is?" Her face drained of all colour. If this spread around, either someone would draw the conclusion that it was Carth or one of the officers that had been watching her. She grabbed onto his coat.

"You can't say anything. Please. If this gets around…,"she paused, trying to figure out what to say. "It just wouldn't be good for me or several other people. Please. I'm begging you." He saw the look in her eyes, and knew that he shouldn't say anything.

"Alright. But if they flat out ask me, I can't lie to them. And your medical records are available to anyone who goes nosing in the right direction." She nodded quickly and left, escorted back to her room. Before the doors were shut, she stopped them with her hand. The soldier on the other side of the door widened his eyes, putting his hand on the gun strapped to his hip.

"Can you do something for me? Could you please tell Admiral Onasi that I need to discuss…my…release? He and he alone, please?" The officer moved his hand back to his side and nodded.

"Yes, ma'am." He closed the door behind him and Schuyler was once again locked in grey-steeled silence. She had to get out. If the agreed to be retrained as A Jedi, they'd know that the baby was Carth's and she'd never be able to see it. If she went to trial…they'd kill them both. She only hoped that Carth would be able to get her out.

* * *

><p>"Ngngh," Carth groaned as he heard a persistent knocking sound on his front door. He dragged himself out of bed glancing at the clock on his way to the door.<p>

"For the love of the force, it's three in the blasted morning. What do you want, Sanders?" The officer widened his eyes and Carth realised that he probably looked like ****.

"Um…the…the…lady," he managed to choke out, looking at the ground.

"What lady? Spit it out."

"The, the Jedi. She…requested you." Carth's eyes widened.

"Why?"

"She said something about discussing her release." He exhaled sharply.

"I'll be there in five minutes." Running back into his apartment, he grabbed a pair of shoes and his jacket. He ran straight to her cell, swiping his card quickly with the guard and stepping inside. He saw Schuyler pacing back and forth in front of the bed, a pensive look on her face. She looked up at him, biting her lip and crossing her arms.

"Carth I-"

"Beautiful, they-" They both spoke at the same time and he smiled. "Go ahead, Gorgeous."

"I need you to smuggle me out. If you want me to come out in one peace, you'll figure out a way to do it."

"I don't understand…Sanders said that you were ready to discuss your release." She smiled wryly.

"Technically I am." He walked around to the couch and sunk down.

"I thought…that you were going to make a choice…"

"To what?" She snarled. "Either to become a mindless puppet of the Jedi or die in a trial where they've decided my fate before I even step through the door?" She walked around to the couch and kneeled in front of him, placing her hand along the side of his face. He covered her hand with his own and closed his eyes, reveling in the feel of her. Her voice softened, "Carth…if you can't get me out, neither of us are going to live." He looked up at her, confused.

"If you make a decision, we'll be fine. They're not going to do anyth-"

"No Carth. Not us," she layed a hand on her stomach. "_Us._ I'm pregnant, Carth.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Pregnant? No. She couldn't be pregnant. They hadn't…well, they had, but surely it wasn't enough…Carth sat there stunned. He hadn't even been thinking about that when they were together, the need of being with her overtrumping everything.

"Carth? Did you hear me? I said I'm pregnant. I'm carrying your child. Our child." She turned his face so that he was looking directly in her eyes. "Carth?"

He shook his head and stood up, trying to find the words for how shocked he was. He couldn't. He needed some time, some space, to process how all of this would affect them. It was wonderful….glorious even. But how would this affect her? Jedi weren't allowed to form relationships, but they weren't forced to be celibate. What would the Counsel say when they found out that she had gotten pregnant…by a Republic Admiral, no less? He needed to find out what he could do to get her out. He had to. Dodonna had always been a close friend of his, and he hoped that appealing to her through their friendship might be able to get Schuyler out. If not, then he and Jolee would have to come up with something.

He quickly walked to the door and knocked to leave. He turned to her, still kneeling on the ground in front of the couch, her eyes a slightly angry, but mostly confusion. "I-I have to go." He walked through the doors that had just opened, never looking back at her.

She seethed. How dare he walk out on her? Telling her he loved her and that he cared about her when all he did was leave when she told him. She knew he had always been lying, this just proved it. He had talked over and over with her about how he wanted a family with her and how he loved her. Ha! If he didn't care about her or their child, then fine. She was all alone, just like she always had been.

* * *

><p>"We're in the middle of a meeting right now, Admiral. I just can't get up and lea-"<p>

"She's pregnant, Jolee." Those three little words through his commlink silenced him like nothing else ever had. He looked around the room in front of the meeting chambers, hoping no one was close enough to hear.

"Where are you?"

"My office."

"I'll be there as soon as I can." Quickly hanging up, he informed Master Luminere that he had a pressing matter to attend to, and hopped an air bus to the Republic's station. Before he had even taken a breath after slipping into "Admiral Onasi's" office, Carth was there in front of him.

"You have to figure out a way to get her out! We can't leave her in there, especially now that she's pregnant! If the Council finds out, not only will I be fired, which I could care less about, but who knows what they'd do to the baby! What if they take the baby away from us? Damn it! What the hell am I supposed to do? What if they let her have the baby, but take it away from her while she sits in the cell? I can't raise a child, hell, the last the one I had went and tried to become a Sith apprentice. My track record is not going to help me with this!" When Carth finished pacing, he looked down to see that Jolee had sat down, his arms crossed and a bored look on his face.

"You done, sonny?" Carth flopped down into his seat and nodded. "Good. Now shush and let me talk. First things first: You need to take a breath and calm down. Getting yourself all worked up over it isn't going to help anything at all. Now, if the Council, which I am on may I remind you, finds out, odds are because she's in whatever "state" that they're trying to label it as, they're going to take the baby. I don't know if that means that they'll put her in a secure location until it's born or if they'll just keep her in the cell with a few extra things. But, they're going to want to know who the father is, and if they find out… Well, I doubt that news of a high standing Republic official getting The Revan pregnant is going to go over well. With anyone." Carth was silent staring at his desk, a look of discomfort on his face. Neither one spoke for several minutes before Carth broke the silence.

"She still wants me to break her out. I couldn't conceive of it before, but now…now that she's pregnant…with our child…," he looked up at Jolee, a pleading look on his face.

"I don't know sonny. If you get caught trying to get her out, you know what the punishment will be, don't you? You'll more than likely be considered a traitor."

"I would rather she and the baby be alright than myself. They matter."

"Then there's not much I can say if you've got your mind set," he stood up. "But know that I'll be here for you, no matter what." Carth looked up at him, and nodded.

"Thank you." Jolee left silently, knowing that there was nothing else to be said for the moment. Carth locked the door behind him and told his secretary to hold all calls, meetings and visitors for the rest of the day. He had an escape plan to hatch.

* * *

><p><em>Knock, knock, knock. <em>The rapping at the door jerked Schuyler out of her meditation. She stood up as the door opened, revealing Jolee. She sat back down on the floor, her eyes closed and her back straight, trying to get back to where she was.

"You might as well sit down," she said after several moments of sensing him stand there.

"Sure I won't disturb you?"

"Nope," she stood up and stretched, going over to sit on the couch.

"Alright then."

"So…How's the weather?"

"Why don't you just cut to the chase already, old man?" she said with a bored tone. Jolee laughed.

"Right. Lots for you to do, hmm? I hear the floor won't stare at itself…" she narrowed her eyes.

"What do you want?"

"I…spoke with Carth." He noticed her eyes widen slightly. She didn't expect him to say anything.

"And? Why is it that you think I care?"

"Because I know you're pregnant." She pursed her lips and looked away from him. Stupid Carth couldn't keep his force damned mouth shut.

"No idea what you're talking about. Is Carth imagining things? He really should get that checked out..." _That's it, Revan. Deny it. _

"Now you and I both know that you're pregnant. You can try to play it off, but you're lying. I can sense it through the Force, and besides, for someone who's on prison rations, your robe is getting a little snug around the middle, isn't it?" He smirked.

"Go to hell."

"Schuyler, you need to talk to me. It's the only way that we can figure out a way to get you and the baby out—"

"I've already figured a way out. Carth just won't go through with it."

"How do you know that? Are you sure he's not working on it right now?" She laughed humourously.

"No he's not. He walked out right after I told him without even a 'goodbye'. Why? Has he been lying to you too? Do you know something I don't?" The door swished open to reveal one of the guards.

"Master Bindo? The Council is calling. They said they need you as soon as possible."

"Jolee? Do you know something? Is Carth—" He cut her off. If the guard overheard something, Carth's plan would unravel before it even began.

"Yes, thank you soldier," he turned to answer Schuyler. "Of course not. **Admiral Onasi's** duty is to the Republic and nothing else. He knows that his job comes before everything else. Have a good day, Revan." He turned to leave behind the guard, but before he could leave he noticed her eyes look glassy. He knew he had hurt her. He'd come back to explain later.

The door shut behind Jolee and the guard and Schuyler closed her eyes. Carth had abandoned her just like she thought, and now Jolee had as well. She knew what she needed to do. It was time to make a decision, and if the Republic was so important to Carth, they could decide her fate. She was going to be put on trial.

* * *

><p>Wow, you guys and your reviews are freaking rocking my socks off, so thank you! Sorry for the long break, but work and life tends to pile up when you actually have an idea on what to write :

tccarty: I was a fan of Lost until the end. I wasted SIX YEARS of my life on that show. I'm a little bitter, can you tell? Any questions you have you can drop and I'll let you know what the answer is if I haven't already planned it out in a further chapter (: Jolee and Juhani will be adressed in a flashback sequence in an upcoming chapter. I'm trying to make this in the same universe as the game, so Carth does have a son, and Morgana did die, it's just that Revan chose the Dark Side after the temple as opposed to the Light...Or did she? Mwahahaha...(; Canderous, Mission, HK, Dustil and Bastila will all be either referenced or brought in in the next chapter or two! And I'm really glad you like it!


	7. Chapter 6

First off let me apologise to everyone who has still been following and leaving reviews! I had every intention of updating this story periodically, but unfortunately that crazy little thing called life jumped in and I never got around to it. I apologise profusely. The good thing is that I've gotten my writing groove back (somewhat) so hopefully I'll be updating more regularly now! Sorry for the short chapter, I'm having to dig out my notes and try to remember everything I had planned for this story back when I was writing it!

* * *

><p>Chapter 6<p>

"Would you please tell your goons to quit manhandling me? I understand that it's obviously been a while since they've laid their hands on an actual living, breathing, female but that doesn't give them an excuse to treat me like this. Besides, you want me in one pretty piece before you execute me, don't you?" She gave Admiral Dodonna a sarcastic smile as they continued to march down the hall. The Admiral gave a weary look back to the squad of men that were escorting the fallen Jedi, and the one in front gave a nod.

Turning his head to the side, he gave his men a look to make sure that they loosened their grip. Schuyler turned to the Commander and rolled her eyes. "So helpful." Dodonna simply took a deep breath. She couldn't wait to be rid of the snarky brunette. The door to the courtroom was already opened, everyone inside waiting for Schuyler to enter. Four guards were posted both in, and outside of the door just in case.

As the large group made their way inside, Allie took note of who all was there. The entire Jedi council, several high ranking military officials, and politicians and a handful of others that she didn't recognise were all seated around the circular room. Allie was placed in the middle on a raised platform, the stun cuffs still securely around her wrists. Holding her head high, she kept her eyes focused on the military officials in front of her, ready to make their decision. A seat was left empty to the right of the man in the middle, but no one seemed to be coming in to take it.

"You are here today because you have decided to turn yourself in for your crimes, is that correct?" A middle aged, balding man with snow white hair questioned in a firm voice. He clearly wasn't going to coddle or play nice. He seemed to be a part of the group that was ready to see her killed already, probably wondering why no one had shot her right then.

"I am. And I plead guilty." Whispers erupted throughout the room, even Jolee's face looked surprised. None of them had expected this to happen. If anything, they figured that she'd turn herself in and beg the Jedi to take her back…Clearly that wasn't what she wanted though. The man in the middle banged a gavel, loudly yelling for order. After everyone quieted down, he stared at the woman in front of him for a long moment before speaking again.

"You do realise what this means? Pleading guilty means there will be no trial and—"

"And I'll accept whatever punishment the court deems fit for my actions. Which we all know will be execution. I'm ready." She gave the man a nod, still locking her eyes with his own. The courtroom was as quiet as a grave, not a single person saying anything or even moving.

"Very well then. The court will decide which penalty best fits your actions and inform you of when it will be carried out. Guards, please escort her back to her cell." The flock of men once again stood all around her as they escorted her back to her holding cell.

* * *

><p>Everything was planned out, down to the tiniest minute detail. There were even plans to take in case something went wrong, or popped up unexpectedly. Carth sat back on his couch, surveying the plans on his coffee table with a relieved sigh. He was going to get out Schuyler and the baby – his baby. They'd figure out something afterwards, it didn't matter at the moment. They were going to be together, that was what was important.<p>

It wasn't until Jolee came in through his door with a worried look on his face that Carth began to think that things wouldn't be so easy. "Jolee, what's—"

"She agreed to go on trial, and she pleaded guilty. They're planning her execution as we speak." Carth quickly stood up, his jaw dropped.

"No! She can't do that! I-I can barely get her out without worrying about all of this!" He ran a hand through his greying hair and huffed. "How the hell am I supposed to do this, Jolee? I-I-I can't lose her. Not again," he murmured the last part. Jolee could see every ounce of pain that Carth was feeling, etched out on his face.

The aging Jedi knew that if he tried to help them, he'd be found out. After all, at the moment he was the only Jedi who actually wanted to help her, not just lock her up and throw away the key like the rest of them wanted. Schuyler had been like a daughter to him, however. He couldn't just let her die, not like this. Carth had lost enough people in his life, and losing Schuyler would kill him.

Pushing up his sleeves, he gave the soldier a sigh and moved over to the couch to properly look at the plans that had been devised. "Well, first of all they're going to double the amount of guards, just in case something happens, so this plan right here isn't going to work…"


End file.
